Are you struggling with your body image? As a Personal Fulfillment Coach, I’ve worked with clients who really want to learn how to improve body image as part of their personal growth journey; to learn how to accept and appreciate all parts of themselves (especially when the negative self-talk gets loud!). In this article, let’s explore some body image thought exercises for adults (I don’t work with kids or teens), body image reflection questions, mindset shifts to improve body image, and more…
How to Improve Body Image
If you want to improve body image, this connects back to what we’ve been exploring earlier this week in two other blog posts:
- How to get over not liking the sound of your voice or how you look in the mirror
- Dealing with Cringe: how to cope with being cringe and how to free yourself from cringe
As you might have noticed, the commonality between all of these (AKA how to stop hating your voice, how to let go of cringing at your past behaviour, and how to improve body image) is that you need do THIS:
- Understand yourself at a deeper level.
- Accept yourself at a deeper level.
- Create desired change at a deeper level.
…And all of THAT heavily involves doing the deep inner mindset work!
You can’t change things unless you know where you’re starting from. And when we’re talking about these kinds of personal changes that you want to make, that truly reflect how you see and perceive yourself…
…Well, that means you need to look very deeply at yourself, to understand yourself on a new level, to accept and embrace *who you are* at your core, and to instigate any desired change from a space of gratitude and fulfillment and abundance (rather than self loathing, for example).
Want to improve your body image? You MUST be willing to do the deep inner mindset work and to improve your relationship with yourself overall.
(And of course, this is all part of self improvement and personal development!)
Learn more about reconnecting with yourself in the Intuition Activated masterclass:
What is positive body image?
You might be wondering, “What IS positive body image?”
Positive body image is about feeling good about who YOU are, at your core — regardless of the current beauty norms and societal expectations of the “ideal” body.
Positive body image is about having a clear and realistic idea of your body, and treating yourself with kindness and compassion.
Positive body image is about being willing to put yourself out there, be visible, and live life to the fullest — in whatever way that means to you!
Positive body image is about caring for yourself, being compassionate toward yourself, accepting and embracing yourself, and having gratitude for yourself as you are.
Positive body image is about improving your awareness and understanding of yourself.
Positive body image has a lot in common with personal fulfillment, because even if you DO desire to change something (for example, in your physical body or in your approach to life), you are doing it from a place of sincere appreciation and acceptance of where you’re currently at: It’s not about “getting away from” your current reality, but rather “working toward” the next great thing.
Thought Exercises, Reflection Questions, and Mindset Shifts to Improve Body Image
I want to preface this by saying that I strongly recommend that you do NOT do this work on your own (self coaching is incredibly powerful, but it is also a skill you develop over time and with practice).
It will be much easier, more enjoyable, and more effective if you’re doing this work and implementing mindset shifts to improve body image with a trained guide and support system at your side… Especially because then you know that the mindset work is done in a safe environment, customized to you, and in a way that actually gets you results.
For example, I’m a Personal Fulfillment Coach: I’ve successfully helped other clients improve body image — you and I can work together on this and make a real difference for your own body image, too. We can do life coaching for body image to help you improve your self kindness and how to respect, care for, and yes, even love yourself.
(Please see a licensed therapist for treatment if you have a mental health condition such as body dysmorphic disorder)
IMPORTANT: We are barely skimming the surface about mindset shifts for how to improve body image in this blog post, because there’s a LOT to cover here!
Depending on the root causes why you struggle with body image — and the specific negative self talk you’re experiencing — that will factor into creating your best approach for how to improve body image.
Body image is often (but not always) closely connected to other issues such as perfectionism, comparison, confidence issues, a lack of self compassion, communication or relationships or boundaries issues, etc. Your body image issues could be in relation to a combination of several of those things, just one of those, or something else altogether.
There is no one-size-fits-all approach. What we’re going over in today’s article are some examples and mindset work to try, but these will not necessarily be the best or the only mindset shifts that are right for you.
(This is, again, where 1:1 life coaching sessions are very valuable!)
That being said, here are a few body image thought exercises, reflection questions, thought reframes, and mindset shifts to get you started…
We’re going to cover several things in this article:
- How I weaned myself off Instagram filters (plus body image reflection questions).
- The self kindness technique to take better care of your body — and yes, improve self love (includes a body image mindset shift).
- Tuning into your thoughts and feelings about clothes BEFORE you look in the mirror (a helpful body image thought exercise).
- A different way to think about wrinkles (a body image thought reframe for your relationship with your face).
Weaning Yourself Off Instagram Filters
I’ve never been super into using filters on Instagram, HOWEVER there was this one filter I used for years… the Paris filter.
Have you seen it? It’s a subtle filter: It doesn’t change the shape of the face, but it kinda smoothes out the face and adds almost a soft, pinkish hue to the skin. It’s very pretty!
…and, it’s a filter: It’s fake.
I “justified” my use of the Paris filter for a long time by telling myself, “It’s basically what I’d look like if I ever took the time to learn how to use foundation and blush.” Until one day, earlier this year, I swiped the Paris filter on a video of me talking to the camera in an Instagram Story, and I realized the truth: “That’s not ME. That’s not what I REALLY look like.”
This realization was a little jarring, and it reminded me of that time that I had been chatting with someone on Instagram for months. She mentioned that I hadn’t responded to her Facebook friend request, and I was horrified — but then, when I saw the request, I knew exactly why I hadn’t responded to it: her Facebook profile photo was a professional “glamour shot” that looked, frankly, NOTHING like how she looked when she did Instagram talk-to-the-camera videos. (It wasn’t just that her hair was different — her skin was different, she was wearing tons of makeup in the Facebook profile photo; it looked nothing like her!)
There was absolutely nothing wrong with the way this woman looked on either Instagram or Facebook… but the glamour shot was so heavily glamourized that it looked like a different person. I didn’t recognize her!
Professional photos can be fantastic — but they should still ***look like YOU.***
Now, the Paris filter didn’t have QUITE the same effect — after all, it just looked like me but with perfectly-applied foundation. But the thing is, I don’t wear foundation in real life. I am a very freckled person! The Paris filter took away my freckles.
Using the Paris filter meant I was taking away a part of myself — I was essentially saying to myself, "How you look in real life isn't good enough."
I knew I had to STOP using it.
But here’s the thing: It’s one thing to decide “I’m not going to use an Instagram filter again” …it’s a whole other thing to actually DO that thing!
It would be a shock to my system and a leap too far out of my comfort zone if I were to go cold-turkey.
Instead, I weaned myself off the Paris filter:
- Filming videos of myself from a little farther away (the “imperfections” and “blemishes” of my face weren’t nearly as visible).
- Not using any filters for timelapse videos (my face was moving so fast that it didn’t seem like that big of a deal).
- Posting photos of me without filters before videos of me without filters (“blemishes” etc were more visible in video than photos).
And now? I don’t post photos or videos of myself with filters. It feels good! It’s nice to know that I’m letting the world see my true face. It’s also been lovely for my own confidence and self esteem, to know that I don’t feel as though I “should” hide my true face.
Here are some body image reflection questions to explore if you, too, are thinking about *letting go* of using filters…
- What makes you think you “need” to use filters?
- How does it feel when you post a photo or a video *without* a filter?
- What kind of vulnerabilities are you afraid of being exposed if you stop using a filter?
- In what ways have other people’s use of filters perhaps been harmful or deceptive to you? (e.g. When we only ever see photos/videos with filters, it might be very difficult to NOT criticize ourselves in the mirror for “not looking like that.”)
- How might YOUR use of filters be harmful or deceptive to other people?
- Are there really lovely parts of yourself that are currently being hidden BECAUSE of the filters you’re using?
- In what ways could *letting go of using filters* be freeing or liberating to yourself?
- What could a multi-phase process of weaning yourself off Instagram filters look like to you? (e.g. you can base it off my own version of doing it in stages, as outlined above.)
This isn’t always easy to do on your own, so we can certainly do 1:1 life coaching sessions on how to improve body image and your relationship with how you look!
Book your life coaching sessions for body image here:
Self Kindness (Body Image Mindset Shift)
Another method for how to begin to improve body image is with a self kindness thought exercise.
For example, are there certain parts of your body that you dislike, or that you’re ashamed of? In that case, those are the exact parts of your body that are ASKING you for a little extra kindness or love!
When you speak cruelly to that part of your body, you are speaking cruelly to a part of YOURSELF.
And you do not deserve that.
No part of your body deserves that, either.
In this body image mindset shift, you are finding one way in which you appreciate that body part, and you are getting to know it better, and you are expressing your appreciation.
For example, your stomach: “Thank you for carrying the delicious food I ate today.” Or in another example, your legs: “I’m so glad you took me for that walk around the block this morning.”
Get as specific as possible to really make the most of this exercise.
Now, thanking that part of yourself is just the first step!
The second step is to give that body part a little pat or a squeeze or stroke it while you express your specific appreciation for it.
You are making it very clear that you are speaking directly to that body part, and you’re also helping yourself to get to know that body part a little better — especially because, if you dislike that body part, you likely avoid touching that part of yourself (or if you DO touch it, it’s probably only ever in a mean way).
I recommend doing this as a daily practice, ideally when you don’t have actively negative thoughts toward that body part. That way, you can get more into the habit of speaking kindly to that body part and also genuinely appreciate it, which will then make it easier for you to draw upon that kindness if you’re having a rough day and struggling with body image.
Your Thoughts & Feelings BEFORE Looking in the Mirror (Body Image Thought Exercise)
Improving body image can be challenging when you’re inundated with beauty norms and expectations of what you “should” look like. It can be hard to figure out what YOU appreciate about the clothes you’re wearing, for example, compared to what society has told you is “flattering.”
One of the ways to start exploring this is to check how clothes feel on your body before you look in the mirror: Put on the outfit you’re thinking of wearing. Do you like the material? Does it feel good against your skin? Are you comfortable with the cut and style of the clothes? When you chose this item, did you light up at the style?
Check in with how you think and feel BEFORE looking in the mirror.
Then, when you DO look in the mirror, if you have any thoughts like “This isn’t flattering,” that’s an opportunity to ask yourself questions like this:
- What do I mean when I think of the word “flattering”?
- How am I defining that word “flattering” — and do I genuinely believe in that definition, or is it something society has taught me to believe?
- What specifically about this outfit do I think is/is not “flattering”?
- Am I worried about being judged for wearing this, and is THAT why I think it’s not “flattering”?
- Is this something I’d want to wear *just for me*, if no one else saw me?
The more that you ask yourself these questions, the more you’ll be able to come to a more realistic idea of what you truly want to wear — which can be a helpful aspect of improving body image.
A Different Way to Look at Wrinkles
Over the past couple years, I’ve been doing the Lillian Bridges’ Face Reading in Classical Chinese Medicine program — it’s fascinating to learn the ways in which our faces reveal *who we are* and *what we experience.*
For instance, since wrinkles are the result of making the same expressions over and over again — and those expressions are typically the result of feeling a particular emotion — there’s a lot of information in the lines that make up different peoples’ faces.
I love the way this program is taught, because it doesn’t view facial features or wrinkles etc on the face as “good” vs “bad” — it all just contributes to the rich tapestry that makes each person unique.
Many people don’t like certain aspects of how they look. They want to hide perceived flaws. But there’s something really lovely about instead thinking of our faces as simply THIS (here’s your new perspective and body image thought reframe!)…
The physical expression of everything you’ve been and are and have gone through, up until this moment.
Your face tells the story of your life — and that’s pretty magical.
For example, those little lines that flick up from the outer corner of your eyes? Those are joy lines! They represent the joy and genuine smiles and laughter from throughout your life. Isn’t that beautiful?
Another example: Those lines that come from the outer alae of the nose to the outer corners of your lips, on either side of your mouth? Those are purpose lines! They represent that you have found meaning and purpose to your life. That’s beautiful, too!
What story does your face tell? You are a rich tapestry, and your face and body are simply a part of the story and physical expression of your life.
Ready to make use of the body image mindset shifts and thought exercises you learned in this article, to transform your relationship with yourself?
Get life coaching for body image improvement!
As your Personal Fulfillment Coach, I’ll help you to improve your body image and build a better relationship with yourself, so that you are no longer ruled by negative self talk.
(And if you’re interested in a face reading, we can include that, too!)
Let’s do this together:
