When you are on your personal development journey and learning how to do mindset work, what you’re really doing is striving to be BETTER. But in the process of doing that… It’s really important that you don’t make this mistake when it comes to personal development and self improvement: Putting yourself down, believing that who you are *now* is less-than, and being dissatisfied with this current iteration of yourself.
(This article originally appeared as the February 3, 2024 edition of the Solopreneur Diary Entries weekly newsletter)
There is nothing wrong with wanting to be a better version of yourself. Self actualization, self improvement, personal growth, and personal development are WONDERFUL!
I’m a Personal Fulfillment Coach — these things are my bread and butter! I'm a big fan of working to improve ourselves.
That being said...
Don't make this mistake when it comes to personal development:
Here’s where a lot of people go “wrong” in their quest for self improvement and betterment:
They view their “current self” as someone who is deficient.
Does that sound familiar?
Here are some thoughts you might experience that indicate you view yourself as deficient:
- “I wish I wasn’t like this.”
- “I’m so disappointed in myself that I’m not farther ahead.”
- “I can’t do XYZ because I’m not good enough to do it.”
- “If only I wasn’t so _____.”
- …etc.
When you believe thoughts like the above, it’s important to remember that those thoughts are exactly that: Thoughts. They are not necessarily truth, even though they might feel very true to you ♥
This is a problem that so many people face: You want to be a better version of yourself in a CONTRACTED sort of way…
…You want to STOP being/doing this vs that.
…You don’t like a certain part of yourself very much.
…You want to be LESS of yourself, in one way or another.
Don't make this mistake when it comes to personal development.
Let me reiterate: There’s nothing wrong with wanting to improve oneself or to change!
That can be WONDERFUL. But you don’t need to do self improvement work by diminishing yourself or lessening yourself or quieting some part of yourself.
You don’t need to improve yourself by focusing so hard on that which you dislike about yourself.
Here’s a different approach that I encourage you to consider: Perhaps, rather than diminishing yourself, there is a beautiful part of yourself that you have been neglecting.
→ What would happen if you embraced being MORE of your core self?
Right now, you are probably hiding some of the best parts of yourself! We don’t want to diminish that light — we don’t want to make you smaller — we want to bring more of the CORE of *you* to the surface.
Personal growth and self development involve identifying those parts of yourself that are at your true core, the unique superpowers you’re currently hiding from yourself and the world… and creating the space for them to flourish.
You don’t need to make yourself smaller. The world doesn’t need a “lesser” version of you — being your best self is about being MORE of your unique self.
Your personal growth journey includes building a better relationship with yourself, learning how to be kinder to yourself and improving self compassion, and creating better support systems within yourself so you don’t have so much internal conflict and struggle…
...so you stop holding yourself back and being your own worst enemy.
Give yourself permission to be MORE of yourself.
Here are 3 questions for your consideration to get you started so you DON’T make this mistake when it comes to personal development…
- What aspects of yourself do you often try to keep smaller? What makes you want to hide that part of yourself?
- What part of yourself do you like, some aspect of yourself that feels very YOU, but which few people ever see? What would happen if they saw that part of you?
- How would it feel to focus more on cultivating what you DO like about yourself, rather than solely trying to stamp down what you DON'T like? What would your life be like if you embraced more of your true, core self?
Your self improvement and personal growth journey is just beginning — and you have it within you to be the best version of yourself, WITHOUT being mean to THIS version of yourself ♥
Bridge the gap between your “present self” and your “future self” — AKA that ideal version of yourself! — in the (free) Intuition Activated MASTERCLASS:
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It originally appeared as the February 3, 2024 edition of the Solopreneur Diary Entries weekly newsletter.
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